Today is numb

Today begins the process of becoming lost in my own thoughts.
I begin to wonder; what if I had done this differently? or, I wonder what they are feeling, sad, happy, excited, regret, nothing? My mind unfortunately tends to lean towards ‘yeah they are definitely happy.’
The thing that shit’s me the most is that this past year has been the best year of my entire life, but all I could do was pick at faults.
Is that just me or is that everyone?
Maybe if I had just have been happy and quit my complaining things would be different.
I need some reassurance from someone without a vagina.
Yesterday (after being sent home from work) I went to Chloe’s house.
One of her sister’s friends, Molly, was there, because she had just lost everything in the flood.
She said that it is human nature to look for the negative in things.
Is this true or are we just so lucky, that we need to find something to complain about, so we choose the people we love?
I think the hardest thing at the moment, is not being able to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

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